Monday, December 15, 2008

When Hot Bodies Happen to Raging Douchebags: Part Dos

What is it about majah douchebag Jared Leto that makes my netheregions tingle? Is it his old, dirty clothes that probably took a lot of effort to look that distressed? Maybe it's his homeless person fingerless gloves. Or it might even be his backwoods bushman beard. I am a total sucker for the beards. I just can't put my fingers on it, but something about this dude reaks of straight up sex. The thing is though, I totally know what kind of guy Jordan Catallano is. He's the type that thinks he's so artsy and smart and hot that no girl is good enough for him. He probably respects smart girls, but he would never actually date one because they aren't attractive enough for him. He naturally dates stereotypical hot girls (like Tila Tequila) who are clingy and have tons of daddy issues, thus are eager to please, but treats them like shit, because he thinks they're light years away from comprehending anything that comes out of his mouth. He probably strings them along and tosses them out after he's finished getting his, because morons don't have feelings and know nothing of love, therefore can't get their heartbroken. And even if they can, what does he care? He's too good for them anyway. I don't see any of them having Basquiat hanging over their fireplace.
Am I about hitting the nail on the head there Jared? I bet I totally am.
By the way! I just noticed that this was taken at The Cure concert. Pretty much confirming everything I just said. He's so damn predictable.


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