Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Brad Pitt Does W Magazine, Talks About Split with Aniston

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Dear sweet 6lb 8 oz baby Jesus. Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt broke up 4 years and these twats are still effing talking about it like it's brand new information. In case you've been living inside a fallout shelter for the last 5 years, let me just get you up to speed: Brad Pitt was all "I fell in love with Angelina Jolie during the filming of "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" so Jenny was all "Bitch! We were still married then! Youz a cheater!" so Brad was all like "Well...um...your momma" and Jenny was all like "YOU'RE MAMA!" and so it went for the next four years. Obviously it's Brad's turn to open his piehole, saying for the 17 millionth time that he did not cheat on Jenny. In fact, he says he's proud of the way he handled things. "What people don't understand is that we filmed 'Mr. and Mrs. Smith' for a year. We were still filming after Jen and I split up. Even then it doesn't mean that there was some kind of dastardly affair. There wasn't. I'm very proud of the way that it was handled. It was respectful." But Brad is also coming to the defenses of his ex-wife and the comments she made about Angelina "very uncool" in a recent interview. He added "Listen, man, Jen is a sweetheart. I think she got dragged into that one, and then there's a second round to all that Angie versus Jen. It's so created. Jen and I still check in with each other. She was a big part of my life, and me hers. I don't see how there cannot be that. That's life, man. That's life."
Well thank you for those eloquently spoken words of wisdom Tommy Chong. Now can we please STFU about the whole thing? I know I'm perpetrating the madness by writing about it, but honestly I'm so amazed we are still discussing this shit that I think in and of itself is news. I mean, at the rate it's going, our great, great, great grandchildren will be learning about the Pitt/Aniston/Jolie great rift of '05 in their history books.
Anyway, here's Brad in the latest issue of W. Let's pretend we don't even notice how hideous he looks.



1 comments:

ChicChickory said...

Aww...my poor sweet Brad looks awful! He needs to either lay off the baby-making and/or adopting, OR get some serious eye cream!

 
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