Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Luke Wilson Has Gained Some Weight

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Now, since society is all up in arms when women put on a few lbs, I thought it only fair to draw attention to some mens when they pack on the pounds. I mean, whenever a dude gains weight it seems to be ok, because society expects them to be smart-not hot. However, when it's the ladies who are getting heavier, it's front page news. Take Fergie for example. Everytime that chick is having her period all the rags are circling her "baby bump" and saying she's pregnant. After all, women are judged primarily on their looks-not their intelligence, wit, and accomplishments. So when someone like Fergie-who is talented and should be recognized for her singing ability-is looking a tad bloated, she must be either pregnant or fat. And even if she's pregnant, she better not gain too much weight, lest she get branded "hefty" and chastised for eating too many saltines. It's a vicious world for girls I tell you.
Anyway, back to Luke who is clearly adopting the Joaquin Pheonix approach to fitness and health. He doesn't exactly look his best. In fact, he's making me feel like my pants are too tight and I should definetely run out and buy some stretchy ones. Perhaps those weight lifting pants that look like a cross between Zach Morris' hangtime attire and Hammer pants. I ask you kindly Luke, step away from the craft services table. Hotness is a tragic thing to waste and you are just flushing yours down the toilet. It's a damn shame.

1 comments:

Healthy Joe said...

HE said..I should definetely run out and buy some stretchy ones. Perhaps those weight lifting pants that look like a cross between Zach Morris' hangtime attire and Hammer pants. I ask you kindly Luke, step away from the craft services table.

 
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