Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Megan Fox is a Man, Baby

That's right. Megan Fox has a penis. What? I didn't say it! She did! The actress took to the red carpet Sunday night for the Golden Globes, and told E!'s Guiliana Ranci (just about the only entertainment host I like) that she was a man. A tranny. A doppleganger for Alan Alda. Yes, Alan Alda. As in Hawkeye from M*A*S*H. "I'm so painfully insecure like, I'm on the verge of vomiting right now. I'm so horrified and embarrased that I'm here. I'm scared." Ok let me just ask, what is with all these actresses pretending like they were just plucked from the fields of Iowa? You have Megan Fox acting as if she's suprised to be invited to the Golden Globes, and you have Kate Winslet pretending to be in disbelief for winning the best actress award as if it was her first movie. She's Kate Winslet for fuck's sake! Are we to believe she's suprised for receiving accolades? She should have just gone up there and been all "Yeah. I won. That just happened. I'm not suprised because I'm the shit. I win awards. That's just how I do. So suck on that Angelina Jolie."
Anyway, back to Megan Fox. She also was asked about her loser boyfriend Brian Austin Green (he'll always be David Silver to me), and she told Guiliana that he was not with her because "He doesn't want to be my date. He's a man. He has an ego...I don't think he cares." Bitch, please! David Silver needs to get the fuck out of her with that "I'm a man" bullshit. Being "a man" means being proud of your significant other, supporting them and being happy for their acomplishments. If that were me, and I was invited to the goddamn Golden Globes, you can bet your ass my husband would be more than happy to be "my date". For real, this chick is on top of the world and she's going to let some jerk off shit on her parade? Fuuuuuuck that! She needs to drop his ass. And if she has trouble finding someone to go with her to awards shows, I'll be her date.


James said...

You are my fuckin hero.
Congratulations, excellent write up.

Anonymous said...

kate winslett was shocked for the sheer fact that she doesnt win these accolades, actually.you would be too if after years of only being nominated they finally give you one!

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