Tuesday, March 31, 2009

I Die...Of Digust

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Anorexic shriveled sea monkey Rachel Zoe has managed to crawl up from the mossy rock from which she was spawned to trademark the phrase "I Die" as the brand name for her soon to be released shitty ass granny bag whore clothing line. Little has been revealed about the upcoming brand, except for a statement by the shriveled sea creture herself who claims the line will be "100% affordable". (To which tax bracket exactly?) The creature from the fug lagoon also said the brand will be inspired by her own "personal style". Great. Just what we need. A bunch of ano bo-hoes wearing maxi dresses and jewelry that outweighs them by 33 poounds.
And "I Die"? Bitch please. I've been using that phrase well before she traded for the Scarsdale Diet for Adderall. I Die. Pft. I bet her homo husband came up with that one. And don't even try to tell me he's not gay. Even if he didn't used to be, one look at that shriveled sea monkey naked has the magical ability to turn any straight man into Rip Freaking Taylor.

2 comments:

Suburbia Steph said...

Shriveled sea monkey....LOL!

Anonymous said...

holy shit, your fucking harsh... so glad i dont know you. give up being an asshole please, it doesnt impress anyone...loser.

 
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