Sunday, May 3, 2009

Let's All Get Wasted and Wear Giant Hats...Otra Vez

Yes that's right-it's Kentucky Derby time which means one thing: PWWs! There's nothing I love more than seeing a bunch of Privileged White Women in hats as big as houses getting all toasted on champs and flirting with the busboy in a desperate attempt to get her husband to once again see her as a sexy woman with options only to be sorely disappointed when she realizes hubby is also flirting with the busboy-and the busboy's flirting back. That's just how the PWWs roll. They also dry their tears with Benjamins and Chanel. That is, if the botox has not permanently damaged her tear ducts, preventing tear production. But I digree.
I have to give the best hat award to Lynn Whitfield whose blue silly string hat was off the chain. She was straight tripping on some Isabella Blow shit and I loved it.
As for the couples, while Eva Marcille and Lance Gross were by far the cutest, I have to give this one to Josh Meyers, Andy Samberg and Seth Meyers who looked like a barbershop quartet circa 1942. Hello my baby hello my darlin', hello my ragtime gal...
Other attendees included Brooke Shields, Gabrielle Union, Kim Kardashian, Aretha Franklin and Kid Rock who showed up looking like a damn wreck. It's like you can't brush your hair? Really? All that money and you can't manage to look like you've had a shower in the past three months? I bet he reeks of Taco Bell, Marlboro Reds, Milwaulkie's Best and strippers.

Anyway here are some of the other guests who obviously all got the "pose with a hand on your hip" memo.

The PWWs begrudgingly thank you for stopping by.


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